


A little Switch

by ParrisRatLord173



Series: unrelated antics of Jim and Oswald [4]
Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Body Swap, Edward is confused, F/M, Fluff and Crack, M/M, realisation of sexuality
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-15
Updated: 2019-04-15
Packaged: 2020-01-13 17:21:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18473551
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ParrisRatLord173/pseuds/ParrisRatLord173
Summary: Jim wakes up in Oswald's body... Oswald wakes up in his... What realisations would this lead to?





	A little Switch

**Author's Note:**

> Edward is very confused.

Jim woke with a sudden start and sat bolt upright, he had had a really, really strange dream… His immediate realisation is that everything smelt weird, like a different person he couldn’t quite place. It was too early… God did he have a one night stand? He started panicking internally as whoever he’d slept with failure to appear in his mind and he couldn’t even remember the girl’s name. But as he looked around, he was alone.

Mind you, that wasn’t surprising. He hadn’t slept around in a long time, it was the middle of the damn apocalypse for god's sake. There weren’t many eligible women, to begin with, and Jim had much more pressing things to worry about.

He yawned and stretched a bit, trying to remember anything from the night before but everything was coming up pretty much blank. His voice sounded a bit off though, that was weird. He felt sore all over and he definitely didn’t do that much exercise the day before, it was more of a paperwork day.

He looked down and immediately panicked a lot more,

That was most certainly not his body nor his skin colour nor his anything and he was still wearing what he normally went to sleep with and that was definitely an invasion of privacy. He pulled the covers up over himself took a deep breath before his vision zeroed in on the strand of hair covering his eye. His hands went straight to his hair. Not his hair, it was black and covered his eyes when he pulled it down more, a choppy fringe kind of style and really a lot softer than his own. He ran his new longer and less calloused fingers through it. The skin was smooth and practically hairless unlike his own, almost like a porcelain doll. He was definitely still a man though.

He was in someone else’s body but in his bed and clothes. The question was how to find out who?

“What the hell?” he literally squeaked, he wanted to test his new voice and find out what this man sounded like also he needed an outlet for whatever the hell was happening right now. He wasn’t expecting such a high pitch… or so familiar. He knew straight away who the voice belonged to despite how weird it sounded in his own head, it made sense he supposed but he was trying to rationalise it away. 

He was Oswald Cobblepot, the Penguin. A man he wasn’t one the very best of terms with that the moment. Scratch that, they were never on good terms and it was better than usual he had to admit. After haven… Oswald had helped out of a lot. When they were trapped together too, they worked together for once.

I mean it explained the ache, he had been beaten around a bit last he checked and the whole being tied up didn’t help. Not to mention his leg, which Jim hadn’t helped one bit by fucking shooting the man. He deserved to get a hit after that, even if Jim had thought it was overkill it most certainly wasn’t. It had been a long while since then, what with Nygma being the culprit behind haven all of Oswald’s involvement in helping Jim catch the man seemed to cease. Of course, he still had a soft spot for the killer, just like Jim did with Oswald, he could never truly bring himself to kill him even after all these years. 

One thing Jim had no idea how he’d explain was why Oswald Cobblepot was nearly naked, in his bed, wearing his clothes. Also where he himself was. Did he switch with Oswald? Was Oswald currently inhabiting Jim’s own body? The thought slightly scared him, showing his entire self to the mobster wasn’t something he was comfortable with. Although he was sure Oswald felt the same about his own body, god this was a mess. 

Jim carefully rolled out of bed and hissed. How the hell did Oswald deal with the constant pain in his leg? Jim hadn’t even taken one step and it hurt like a bitch. Jim felt another wave of guilt crash over him at the thought he’d added to the pain. Karma’s a bitch. 

He remained wrapped in the sheets as he waddled carefully, wincing at each step, to the wardrobe to grab something to wear so he didn’t have to deal with an unclothed Oswald. Getting dressed with your eyes closed may be a bit of a hassle but it was one he was ready to deal with to avoid awkwardness. 

He did so with limited success, getting into a button up shirt, doing the buttons wrong, trying again with his eyes open and limited awkwardness. He pulled on his normal uniform dress pants which were comically long on the smaller man’s body. Harvey would normally come around and check on him around this time in the morning not bothering with modesty at all, he prayed he could get out and avoid that this morning or their conversation might be a little questionable.

He could already imagine his accusations of murdering Jim or even worse, sleeping with him. Harvey had always said he was too soft on Oswald, especially when he didn’t kill him earlier that year… Oswald was also rather soft on him, in the early days of their acquaintanceship with him begging to be friends Jim had assumed he had a crush on him. Those days were gone now, it was constantly passive aggressive between them. At best case, they’d get along for a few hours and at worse, they’d be at each other's throats. 

This was a very strange way to bring them back together, he must say. After discovering everything with doctor strange Jim had half a mind to blame him for… whatever this was. It was like they just switched places, everything was as it should be apart from their bodies. He had no idea how he was going to make it to Oswald’s without getting found out or killed. Oswald wasn’t very popular and Jim wasn’t used to his body and its various pains at all.

He took what he assumed was the best course of action once he finished dressing, he grabbed a gun, his phone and dashed out the backdoor as quickly as his sore legs could carry him. It was early enough that there wouldn't be much action outside. He would text Harvey and just tell him he went out quickly and would be back soon. If he got questioned, make up a bullshit excuse. 

He knew the way pretty well but maneuvering a new body while also being wary of anyone and anything would be a recipe for something going terribly wrong. If anyone saw Oswald leaving through the back door of the GCPD wearing his clothes there would at least be some chatter, at worst be an uprise. Harvey’d kill him.

So he laid low and made his way slowly to the city hall, praying that Oswald hadn’t done anything bad to his body if he was in it at all. Also that he wouldn’t be found, or Oswald wouldn’t be found. There were so many problems with this whole situation and Jim could not wait to get out of it.

 

When Oswald had woken up, it had been to his darling Edward whining. The dog loved to wake him up at odd hours in the morning begging for food. With the second Edward also nearby it was twice as bad, although the human one tended to work on the submarine through the night and only let himself sleep or pass out more like when Oswald practically begged him.

Them being friends again was a nice change, he hadn’t expected it when he found out the man was alive. Nor was he expecting such offence to his dog. But they got along well enough still, their aggressive arguments became playful banter and their old friendship was almost restored to its former glory. The difference was, it was just friendship now. Oswald actually prefer it that way, he could care about Ed and Ed cared just as much about him but there wasn’t any fear of betrayal left. The past was in the past and it was time to move on.

Unfortunately for Oswald not everything ever stayed in the past, one Jim Gordon had been sticking in his life through the whole time he’s known him. His old feelings once again rising to the forefront of his mind, especially at certain points… had it been really necessary to use each other as support to get the shiv? It was Jim who suggested it when not a minute before he was using the pillar… Wouldn’t it have been just as easy? Instead, Oswald was subjected to a few seconds of being pressed against the muscled man with nothing he could do about it. Oswald knew he was over thinking the whole interaction but it didn’t really matter, better than discussing it with Ed, who would flip his shit.

Oswald turned over in his bed and saw his Ed laying on the bed beside him slobbering all over the covered and being generally adorable as usual. Oswald reached a hand over carelessly to begin patting him when he realised something was off. Not only was the sleeve of his pyjamas way further up his arm then it should rationally be, a lot tighter than the night before as well. But his entire arm was most certainly not his own. Tanned and muscled skin and entirely different hands from his own slender and extraordinarily pale ones. He starred at the anomaly unblinking for a few seconds before jumping up in shock.

What the hell was happening? Was this some sort of new thing that Dr Strange had created? Putting him into a new body or maybe even switching his body parts. No wonder Ed looked confused. He sat up in bed and immediately realised not only had he gotten substantially physically bigger and stronger but that this leg was healed entirely. Maybe this wasn't so bad…

Either way, he needed to find his biggest suit asap and get changed, also work out who this was. Already he knew they had dirty blonde hair, but it wasn’t clicking quite yet. He may not even know them.

He took every thought back when he looked at himself in the mirror after walking normally for the first time in years, into the bathroom and straight into the mirror above the sink. Jim Gordon was looking back at him wide-eyed and confused and in clothing much too small. 

“What the hell?” Oswald stuttered loudly, it was indeed his voice, higher than Jim’s usual voice actually. Maybe it was because Oswald was using it, he didn’t have time to ponder that now though, rather he was running hands over his face trying to get used to the new shape and feel of everything. He paced the room in confusion, resisting the urge to discover the rest of his new body… 

What was he going to do? He had a human resident of this home and he didn’t know how to explain to Ed that he’d woken up as another person entirely. Or if Ed would even believe him, that he’d somehow woken up as who was probably Ed’s current worst enemy. He couldn’t leave there were too many people in City hall, who would see one Jim Gordon of the GCPD dressed in Oswald’s clothing and ask too many questions.

Where was Jim? Was Jim in his own body, would there be two of them now? Even worse was Jim in his body? The thought scared Oswald as he rushed out of the bathroom to put on some more appropriate clothing. He had to keep his mind occupied, he rifled his own closet trying desperately to find something half appropriate for the detective. He found an oversized shirt and pants and was beginning to work out how to put them on without invading the man’s privacy more than needed. He was halfway through willfully not looking down while pulling on a shirt when he heard a knock. Panicking he forgot about the rest of the buttons and quietly stepped back towards the bathroom, maybe just avoiding him would be the best course of action.

“Oswald? I’m heading down to the submarine soon.” Edward, of course, he’d come to check on Oswald like the good friend he was. The issue was he couldn’t exactly answer in another voice, especially not this voice. All good ideas escaped him and decided the best course of action would be quite literally hiding under his covers. So he feigned not hearing and practically ran, (He could actually run properly now,) back to bed and pulled his covered over his full body praying that Ed would not question it.

Ed being the inquisitive man he was, promptly opened the door. “Hey, little guy do you know where Oswald is?” He said to the dog in a far more babying voice that he’d ever do around Oswald himself. In any other situation hearing it, he would’ve laughed but Oswald was far too nervous for that right now. He must have spotted the lump in Oswald’s bed as he sighed, turned around, and closed the door behind him. Oswald heard Ed the dog pattering not far behind his human counterpart and he was now alone in the room.

Oswald let out a quiet sigh of relief and rolled back out of bed. Plotting how to escape his own home without detection. Then he remembered there was such a thing as a phone, he quietly grabbed his own and locked himself in the bathroom to wait for until he came up with an idea better than his current one, hiding.

 

When Ed woke up. His immediate thought was ‘oh shit I went to sleep.’ Rather than anything else. He did his usual morning routine of checking things around the city hall, making sure his makeshift bedroom was secure and that Oswald hadn’t drugged him to actually get to sleep, he wasn’t sure the last time he had sleep voluntarily. 

He set about going back to work, finding a dry cracker calling it breakfast and running up to tell Oswald he was off again if he needed to find him later. Going over the time they had spent living together again recently, Oswald was usually awake around this time frame and getting ready for the day. They were entirely comfortable within each other so even if Oswald was getting dressed he’d assumed he’d be let in automatically. It seemed he was wrong.

Oswald didn’t answer him but he did hear shuffling. He automatically let himself in and found Edward the dog waddling around on the floor. Despite the unfortunate naming, he did actually like the dog, he was cute and a welcome member of the household useless as he may be. He assumed what he heard was the dog, Oswald was clearly either in the bathroom or still asleep. He quietly leant down to pet the dog who replicated his attention with a myriad of licks and almost biting his hand. He found Oswald sleeping, covering his body fully, he wasn’t surprised Oswald always slept like he was protecting himself from the outside world. 

Guess it was just a late morning, Oswald probably needed sleep in anyway. He took the dog with him as to not disturb his friend, walking down the stairs in an all too casual way. He had not expected to be greeted by Oswald, the Oswald he had just seen sleeping in his bed upstairs, dressed completely unusually and leaning against a pillar.

“Oswald?” Edward stepped back in shock hand flying to his pocket where a gun usually sat, unfortunately for him, it didn’t currently. Was this a shapeshifter? He’d heard there had been one recently that the GCPD dealt with. Was this them?

Not-Oswald turned to face Edward and put his hands in the air. “I can explain!” He exclaimed stumbling back, he wasn’t used to the leg. Further proof it wasn’t Oswald at all. “Ed I know this is weird but just let me get upstairs.” He said carefully, he was being quite loud actually. Ed just stood there effectively blocking the stairs. He had no way to prove it wasn’t Oswald so he couldn’t call for help either.

 

Oswald heard the commotion downstairs and bolted out the bathroom and hit Jim Gordon’s number. He paced around the room hoping Jim would pick up in time to explain the mess. He finished getting dressed and sat on the edge of his bed holding the phone out in front of him.

The phone rang, also not Oswald’s dial tone. Ed noted.

“Oswald?” Oswald asked into the phone after hurriedly picking up. He heard a muffled sigh of relief. “Are you upstairs?” The conversation was cut off so Ed could only watch in shocked confusion and concern as whatever was happening played out. “Just get out here!”

The door upstairs to Oswald’s room opened and Jim mother fucking Gordon stepped out to greet them, only adding to Ed’s confusion.

“Jim?” The detective asked, to Oswald he might add. Oswald nodded- Oh. it clicked for Ed. They’d switched somehow. That's what was happening. Ed slumped against the railing as Jim practically ran downstairs and glared at what Osw-Jim was wearing. This was going to get confusing rather quickly. “I’m so sorry Ed I didn’t feel like confronting you with this without proof,” Oswald said to his friend looking actually sympathetic even while in Jim’s body, he could tell from body language alone that it wasn’t Jim.

“Alright enough pleasantries, do you have any idea how the hell this happened?” Jim exclaimed gesturing between them in shock. Ed just sat there, watching this happen, in utter confusion. “No, for your information detective, I assumed messing with the wrong people was your sort of thing.” Oswald hissed back sounding rather intimidating. Ed decided now was probably a good time to remove himself from this whole equation.

“Shut up both of you. I’ll research it.” Ed clapped his hands together and both men glared at him. After a moment of silence they nodded, it was going to be a long day ahead of them.

**Author's Note:**

> Oswald and Jim are gonna be hanging out in confusion for the rest of the time.


End file.
